Civility and Grooming

The other day a friend of mine was taking an airport shuttle and heard a strange, distracting noise. She looked around and finally found the culprit: a woman who was clipping her fingernails! My friend was completely disgusted and in shock. The woman was well-groomed (probably because she grooms in public) and nicely dressed, but whatever poised and elegant image she had built up was totally ruined by her uncouth behavior. Her fingernails were flying onto her lap and onto the floor, and people were avoiding sitting by her so that they wouldn’t be caught in the crossfire.

Practicing good civility means not engaging in rude or inappropriate behavior that is better left to the beauty parlor or bathroom. Touching up your lipstick is one thing; busting out your makeup bag and glamming up in full view of everyone is another. I once sat next to a woman on a plane who thought it would be a good idea to brush her long hair while still in her seat (I should have told her to use the bathroom). And I’ve heard horror stories of people dousing their locks with hair spray, applying deodorant, and even flossing (yuck!) in public places like a bus, waiting line, or movie theater.

If you need to freshen up, take it to the bathroom or locker room. And certain grooming regimens, such as flossing or clipping your nails, are better done at home. After all, would you want to be next to some stranger doing that? Probably not!

President Obama’s Royal Etiquette Mishap

Even heads of state make etiquette blunders—especially when royalty is involved. Last time the Obamas visited Britain’s royal family, the First Lady ruffled feathers by touching the Queen (a big no-no, apparently). Last week, it was the President’s turn to cause a minor breach of protocol by talking over British national anthem.

Here’s how it happened: While addressing dinner guests, Pres. Obama said “I propose a toast to her majesty, the queen.” Unbeknownst to him, these words were a cue to the band, who began playing “God Save the Queen.” He had no choice but to finish his speech by talking over the music, as guests stood in salute. The Queen herself did not raise her glass until the anthem had finished playing. 

Of course, you could argue that the band was to blame for the mishap. Still, if I were Pres. Obama, I would be very upset at my international protocol team. It would have been prudent of them to have had the speech approved by someone with a wealth of experience on royal protocol in order to avoid any etiquette breaches.

If you’re travelling abroad, I urge you to brush up on the country’s culture and etiquette guidelines. Making certain gestures or greeting someone with a particular hand can be considered a major slight in some regions. And while it’s unlikely you’ll have to give a speech toasting the Queen, having a good grasp of local customs will help you avoid an unpleasant encounter.