International Travel Etiquette: What You Need To Know

My husband Bernie and I are about to head to Europe for a much-needed vacation. As such, I’m brushing up on my international travel etiquette. Even though I spent a lot of time growing up in France and Venezuela, I still find myself on uncertain footing in places that are foreign to me. But that’s part of the fun! Challenge yourself to be a better traveler by following these travel tips:

-Learn a little language. If you’re visiting a country where English is not the mother tongue, do yourself and the locals a favor by learning at least a few key phrases. You needn’t be fluent in French, but it will greatly help you be more independent and respectful—why rely on others to speak English? For starters, teach yourself the sayings for hello, goodbye, excuse me (in case you accidentally bump into someone), please, thank you, how much, and where. Don’t get frustrated if you stop and ask a local for directions and they don’t speak English.

-Walk this way. Observe the rules of traffic. In the UK people, like cars, tend to walk on the left, which is the opposite of how we walk here in the States. They also have “zebra crossings,” which are black and white striped road crossings (Beatles fans will recall the iconic Abbey Road photo) which give pedestrians the right of way. If you have rented a car, you must stop at these crossings if a pedestrian is present. If you are walking, go ahead and cross—standing there and waving cars on will only slow traffic further.

-Brush up on local etiquette. Every country has its own set of mores. In some areas it’s considered offensive to use the left hand when waving or handing over money. In other countries, being showy or loud can rub others the wrong way. I recommend reading the etiquette section of your guidebook before you go. As a general rule, though, being polite and having good manners will get you far!

-Roll with the punches. Every culture has its own customs, some of which may seem odd or unconventional to us. We may be served food that we wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole. However, it’s always best to be respectful and enjoy the ride. Acting like a baby or a giggling five-year-old is rude. After all, why even leave the house if you expect everything to be just like home?

Fashion Rules Every Woman Should Know

A friend of mine sent me an article last week about style at England’s Grand National horse race. Or, should I say, lack of style? As you can see from the photos, many female attendees turned up in “eye-popping” ensembles that did them no favors. Garish prints, heavy-handed accessories, Technicolor hair, and an excess of cleavage on display … it was one fashion disaster after another. Instead of looking elegant, they looked crass.

Few of us may have occasion to attend a horse race (and if you do, look to Julia Roberts in “Pretty Woman” for inspiration), but we can still pick up a few style lessons from these women. Read on for tips on avoiding their fashion blunders.

-If you’re wearing a dramatic hat or fascinator, avoid wearing big statement earrings. Earrings will interfere with the flow of the look and make your head appear weighed down. Stick to studs or small hoops and keep your locks sleek and simple.

-Flashing lots of cleavage will draw the wrong kind of attention. Always wear a bra that works with the lines of your dress, and avoid scandalously plunging necklines.

-Skunk stripes and Technicolor hair may be okay for some teenage punk rocker, but they’re not exactly sophisticated or age-appropriate. A female lawyer I know once jokingly asked her boss what he would do if she turned up at the office with blue highlights. He told her he would question her judgment and be reluctant to assign her high-profile cases. Enough said.

-I love prints, but it’s important to be wary of wild patterns that can come off as garish or adolescent. Intense animal prints or large, neon flowers can be overwhelming. One solution is to wear a solid dress with a printed bag or scarf. A little goes a long way!

-Don’t try to cram too many trends into one outfit. Classics are classics for a reason—they’re timeless, effortlessly chic, and designed to offset the trendiness of, say, this season’s color-blocked stripes and maxi skirts. If you want to look up-to-date, pick just one trend and build your outfit around that.

Bringing Civility Back to Sports

What has gotten into people? Last week a 42-year-old San Francisco Giants fan had to be put into a medically induced coma after he was beaten from behind by two Los Angeles Dodgers fans in the parking lot of Dodgers Stadium. The Dodgers had just beaten the Giants, and apparently these two thugs felt—in the presence of a 10-year-old child!—the need to celebrate by attacking an opposing fan. The man hit his head on the concrete, lost consciousness, and is now fighting for his life. Some game, huh?

Hurling taunts and verbally abusing the other teams’ fans seems to be the norm at many sporting events these days. In England, the “away” team’s fans are separated from others by a protective barrier of security guards. I’m all for competition, but somewhere along the line we’ve gone from being avid supporters to rabid fans baying for blood. It’s ugly and unacceptable.

If you are celebrating your favorite team, whether in a bar or at the stadium, resist the urge to bad-mouth the other team, name-call, or rub a victory in other people’s faces. If your team loses, don’t take it out on others. Shouting down another fan or beating them up isn’t going to magically improve your team’s record. It’s going to end with someone in the hospital and someone in jail. Curbing your alcohol intake during sporting events can also help keep the calm. We’re more likely to get riled up when we’ve had too much to drink. Also, use common sense. If you support one team, you probably shouldn’t sit near a pack of wild fans for the opposing team. Why fuel the fire?

Let’s bring back a little civility to sports!

Civility and Respecting Other People’s Space

The other day I was walking down the street when another woman bumped right into me. I was carrying a heavy shoulder bag, which slipped off my arm when she jostled me. I was quite startled and looked back at the woman, expecting her to say “excuse me” at the very least. But no—she just kept charging down the street without so much as a glance in my direction. The woman was older, but that is still no excuse for such rude behavior. All I could was pick up my belongings, compose myself, and shake my head.

Basic civility means respecting other people’s space, not charging along and expecting other people to get out of our way. It means stepping to the side when we’re waiting for the elevator or train doors to open, to make way for any exiting passengers. It means standing on the right side of an escalator so that those in a hurry can pass on the left. It means observing the rules of the road so that we and our fellow drivers are safe.

And if, for some reason, you accidentally bump into someone or block their way, it means having the courtesy to at least apologize or check that the other person is okay. If we let that courtesy lapse, we slowly begin to chip away at the civility in our society. Do we really want to live in a world in which it’s acceptable to bump into innocent bystanders without a word of concern? I sure don’t!