Politics and the Loss of Civility

The health insurance reform bill has sparked so much controversy and animosity over the past week. Of course, it’s natural for politics to get testy, but the war of words surrounding this particular measure has gotten downright ugly. People on both ends of the political spectrum have launched into vicious backbiting on public forums like Twitter and Facebook, while some politicians have even allegedly faced death threats.

No matter what your political beliefs, I think we can all agree that this behavior is ridiculous and shameful. It’s great to feel passionately about an issue, but resorting to barbaric tactics, gloating when you win and bitterly complaining—especially on public social networks that can be seen by anyone—brings out the worst in us.

What happened to civility and respect? It seems like some of us have forgotten that it’s possible to stand up for your beliefs without resorting to threats and squabbling.

For starters, you should avoid talking about divisive topics like politics or religion at the office or when you’re surrounded by people you don’t know very well. Ranting on Twitter or Facebook is only going to incite more drama. Who needs the stress? If you do find yourself in a debate, rather than name-calling or belittling the other side, calmly explain your position—offline!—and agree to disagree. Don’t demonize or insult the opposition.

If you oppose something, write a letter to your local politician, but don’t insult or threaten them. Simply state, “I am disappointed that you voted this way and it will influence my vote in the next election.”

How we react to situations says a lot about our character. Do you want to be known as someone who handles adversity with dignity, or as a whiner who is blowing things out of proportion? Do you want to “win” with grace, or with a big, nasty “I told you so”? The former is so much more appealing!

Putting Your Problems Into Perspective

The other day I was reading the etiquette column in the New York Times. The first query was from a man who was vowing never to speak to some friends because they had not offered him their oysters during brunch.

I couldn’t believe it! With all that’s going on in the world, this guy is steamed about a few oysters? Imagine if he were in Haiti, or had a loved one in the military…

It seems that often we are all about ourselves and everyone is “woe is me.” I think the self-absorbed nature of Twitter and Facebook are partly to blame—when we’re given a free pass to talk about ourselves as much as we like, we can’t help but rant and whine from time to time.

The kids are being wild! The dishwasher is broken! Your favorite program was interrupted by the president’s speech. How will you ever survive?

It isn’t until you open your mind and your ears to listen to other people that you realize how great you have it. One of my favorite sayings is “it can always be worse,” and it can. We all complain now and then, but if your worst problem is that your favorite singer got voted off “American Idol,” well, I’d say you have it pretty good.

Personally, I’m all about gratitude. I recommend everyone start a gratitude journal and try to write something in it every day, even if it’s something as simple as “I’m grateful the sun was shining today.” If you try to write every day, it will become habit. Soon enough it will become a habit in your thoughts as well and will become part of your daily life.

So instead of thinking “My boss is driving me crazy,” think about how grateful you are to have a boss in this tough economic climate. Focus on the good aspects of your life, and change the bad ones. Sometimes things may not go our way, but rather than obsessing over it and complaining bitterly to anyone who will listen, it’s best to simply recognize the problem, figure out how to fix it, and take action.

How Your Appearance Can Make or Break an Interview

Are you on the hunt for a new job? Before you head off to your next interview, consider the impact your appearance can have on your career.

A new survey from Britain’s The Hospital Group has revealed that nearly half of employers wouldn’t hire someone with bad teeth or unpleasant breath. A third of bosses also reportedly saw excessive sweating as a turn-off, while tattoos, bad skin and facial piercings were also considered taboo.

I always say that there are two days when you absolutely have to look your very best: your wedding day and your first interview. An impressive resume and fancy suit may not be enough to get your foot on the corporate ladder. The devil is in the details, so don’t overlook your grooming.

Invest in a tooth whitening treatment (or at least get the affordable whitening strips—they make a big difference) and gargle some mouthwash before your interview. Don’t chew gum or a mint—that looks unprofessional—and try to avoid sipping coffee or tea beforehand as they can give you strong breath. And if you have major dental problems that make you self-conscious, it’s worth splurging on a trip to the dentist or even a cosmetic dentist. Even replacing your noticeable black fillings with undetectable white ones can give you a confidence boost!

If you have problem skin, consult a dermatologist to find a skincare regimen that works for you. Avoid heavy makeup or facial treatments in the days before your interview, as they can irritate sensitive skin. And don’t forget your nails—they should healthy-looking and free of ragged edges, whether you’re male or female.

Your shoes and accessories—belts, handbags, briefcases, etc.—should be in good condition. Avoid scuffed leather or anything too trendy. Give your leather goods a nice polish to upgrade your image. If you’re a woman being interviewed, avoid loading yourself down with both a handbag and a briefcase, especially if you’re petite. It should be one or the other.

When you’re waiting in the lobby for your interviewer to arrive, make sure you are polite to the receptionist, and that you smile and sit up straight. The receptionist’s first impression often has a huge influence on the boss.

Also, if you’re offered a glass of water, say no because oftentimes you may not know what to do with the glass when the interviewer comes to greet you. This happened to me once and it will never happen again! There was nowhere to leave the glass and I was having trouble getting out of a very soft and cushy chair while grabbing my purse and portfolio and figuring out what to do with the glass. It was embarrassing. Speaking of which, you should opt for a straight-backed chair rather than a soft, sinkable sofa to sit in if you have a choice.

Finally, if you are not 100% sure of where your interview is located, do a dry run the day before. You NEVER want to be late for an interview. It leaves a very bad first impression!

Updating Your Style for Spring: The Season’s Top Trends

I don’t know about you, but I’m dying to pack away my heavy coats and sweaters and dive into a lighter, brighter spring wardrobe. So what trends are hot this spring? Glad you asked.

Turquoise: Turquoise was named 2010’s top color by Pantone, so try to give your wardrobe a shot of this brilliant blue. It’s a universal hue and looks good on everyone. Ladies, a turquoise sheath or silk blouse will wow ‘em this season, or you can stick to a subtler scarf, handbag or traditional turquoise jewelry.

Sheer Panels: This sexy trend can still work for day if you do it right. A beautiful off-white or pastel blouse with a sheer lace bodice or cap sleeves will help you nail the trend without exposing too much skin. Save the sheer-backed little black dress for night!

Prints: Give your closet a graphic twist with bold prints this season, running the gamut from exotic tribal prints (great with khakis, a safari jacket or wooden bangles) to futuristic sci-fi graphics. (Hint: Even a neutral snakeskin clutch can help you reference this look.)

Wooden-Soled Shoes: This season’s “it” shoe is a wooden-soled clog or wedge sandal. These work with jeans and sundresses alike, in a variety of styles that range from “hippie chick” to “sleek exec on holiday.”

Denim: Even designer handbags are getting the denim makeover this spring. This season look for fitted denim blazers and shirts and that perfect pair of baby blues for your weekend wardrobe.

Sorbet Shades. Spring is traditionally all about pastels, but this year you’ll want to look for pastel shades with an intensity—think lemon yellow or pistachio green. Mix and match your pastels for extra punch—think an ice blue sheath paired with strappy lavender heels.

“Alice in Wonderland”-Inspired Details: Delicate fabrics like chiffon and romantic details (lace, ruffles, bows) are enjoying a renaissance thanks to the Tim Burton film. One caveat: Tread lightly if you’re a woman of a certain age to avoid looking too girlish.

How Customer Service Can Make or Break Your Business

Last week an acquaintance of mine was trying to fly from New York City to Houston. Unfortunately, New York had heavy snows and his flight was canceled. Of course, that’s unavoidable when the weather is bad. My friend understood that. However, the way his airline handled the situation was harder for him to stomach.

First, the airline canceled his flight and then rebooked him without notifying him; typically passengers receive an email or phone call about any major flight change. The new flight gave him very little time to make his connection, so my friend tried to call the airline and speak to a customer service representative to get more information about available flights.

Shockingly, the airline’s phone number simply gave him a busy signal—no message or option to hold. He wound up having to call over and over again for several hours.

Determined to speak to someone, my friend also tried the airline’s web customer service option. He finally found the contact information buried under an inappropriate section on the airline’s website. When he started online chatting with the customer service rep, the rep told him his flight had been canceled. They chatted for several minutes, at which point the rep said, “Oh, I meant the flight had not been canceled.” He then told my frustrated friend he could not help and that he should keep calling the (busy) number.

Needless to say, my friend won’t be flying with that airline ever again—and nor will the countless friends who heard about the bad experience. (For the record, it was Delta.)

This story illustrates how bad customer service can really hurt a company. My friend understood that he would have flight delays or cancelations because of the bad weather. But not having the option to speak to someone—or even leave a message—and not getting notifications about his flights made the situation so much worse.

Is your company’s customer service up to par? Are you available to your customers or clients, either by having a call waiting or voicemail function that is constantly checked? Are the people who answer the phones in your office well-informed and trained to handle complaints? If not, you could be hurting your image and frustrating valuable clients!